Guest Post from Doug Ten Rose
Day Two of the Book Blogger Fair Features a Guest Post by Doug "Ten" Rose
Defeating the Bait-and-Switch
You may be asking, “What is the old psychological bait-and-switch move?” I’ll tell you. It’s the oldest trick in the book. It is often done without the awareness of the perpetrator. More often than not the perps aren’t even in touch with themselves enough to realize they’re doing it. (Occasionally, it is a more malicious and intentional form of manipulation.)
Let’s say that you are Party B. A fellow staff member—or even your boss, or a co-worker who wants to climb the ladder of success over your dead body, your mother, teenage son, or whoever—is Party A. (If you are already saying, “Hey I’m the A. Let that other pain-in-the-butt be Party B,” then your chances of avoiding the pitfalls of the psychological bait-and-switch are very good!)
You are a nice, friendly, kind, and cooperative person. Party A is a nasty, sarcastic, wired-up type who loves to screw and manipulate people. Party A people are warped, frustrated, and believe that since they have no happiness or sense of self-worth, neither should anyone else. They love to pull your chain, wouldn’t climb off your back if you bought them a diamond-studded rope ladder to do it with, and they live to annoy.
As usual, you are trying to be nice to everyone. You speak to Party A as you would to anyone else—intent on a happy and harmonious relationship. But Party A doesn’t know how to handle this. The rip in the fabric of this person’s reality tells him or her that it’s an either-me-or-you, dog-eat-dog, take-advantage-before-being-taken-advantage-of world where being aggressively defensive is of paramount importance. These attitudes usually result in behavior that is nastier than a pickled egg fart collection in an airtight room. Day after day you try to be nice to this person in the hope that your goodness will prove contagious. Mr./Ms. A stays deaf to your most cordial approaches and continues to dump bucket loads of irritating drama into your life.
Sooner or later it happens. You lose it. After what seems like eons of dealing with this situation in a civilized manner, you just can’t take it anymore. You give Party A a rebate on the ration of shit that he or she has been shoveling in your direction for so long. After a good ten minutes of yelling at each other, you stomp away with your blood pressure raised and your day ruined. You’re now as stressed out, aggravated, and miserable as A has always been. You’re soured and angry.
220Defeating the Bait-and-Switch
This is you now! The attack on your peace of mind is no longer singularly directed from an external, defensible source. It now has an internal base that’s a lot more dangerous to you. The nastiness of A, formerly a minor influence outside of your psyche, has now eaten away slowly but steadily at your patience and compassion until it has succeeded in boring a hole right through your previously harmonious state of mind. Your structural integrity has collapsed and is now being eaten by your newly acquired chemical imbalance, which is a direct result of your newly acquired psychological imbalance. Your stomach may hurt, your head may ache, and your happiness is in pain.
As this happens to folks like us, Party A people will be laughing their asses off! They may have had a conscious plan to do you in, but more likely they’re so out of touch with themselves that they don’t even know what they did. They’re happy anyway.
A subconscious mind can be a dangerous thing. That’s why so many of Earth’s most famous wise folk have spent so much of their time moving their subconscious depths to the conscious surface.
So now A is happy and B is ragged out. Anyone walking into a room where both A and B are present would be fooled. It would appear that Party A was a B and that Party B was an A—and in fact, until B regains composure and simple sanity, that indeed has become the truth of the situation! Every time A comes into the room, B gets nervous, aggravated, and apprehensive. Party A’s job of making B a lesser human is completed. B has now effectively taken over the job that A was doing. B is now busting his or her own chops and getting on his or her own nerves. Party A doesn’t even have to be around! B will still be nervously concerned with what A might do or say next.
Party A, thoroughly satisfied with the success of this process, is now more B-like in demeanor—relaxed and happy. Party B, on the other hand, is now suffering a self-engendered attitude attack as well as the real attacks on his or her peace of mind that Party A may still be generating. In addition, B has to deal with the degree of self-loathing and embarrassment caused by losing composure in public and embracing an inferior mind set.
The bait-and-switch is complete.
Maybe the rest of the staff will outsmart Beryl. Maybe they will snap back into happiness, realizing that what they want to be is more important than what any negative external influence wants them to be.
The only way to win this game is to not play.
For more see http://www.fearlesspuppy.org
*ALL AUTHOR PROFITS SPONSOR WISDOM PROFESSIONALS AND THEIR EFFORTS *
“Once you accept the universe as being something expanding into an infinite nothing which is something,
wearing stripes with plaid is easy.” Albert Einstein
Reincarnation Through Common Sense is a book of stripes and plaid in the most entertaining sense of Einstein’s words. Westerners have written many books about living in Asian temples. None are like this true story.
The rural Buddhist Monks and Nuns of a forest temple in Asia adopt a very troubled soul from Brooklyn, New York. He can’t speak the language. No one there speaks English. He is penniless, has no intention of studying spiritual discipline, and is amusingly psychotic. He writes to future readers in order to tame his comic insanity. This is not a book by a theology student! The author is nonetheless given access to the ancient roots and spiritual wings that define the Wisdom Professionals who have rescued him. He redefines life and reports the details in a manner so intimate and natural that you’ll think you are having coffee on a barstool in the temple with him. You may laugh a lot on your way to Nirvana! You may say “Ouch!” a few times, too.
Magic is redefined as objective reality and common sense. Spirit is presented as a functional friend, without the fairy dust. Moods run from adventurous psychosis through enlightened bliss as writing styles run through ancient prose to the most erudite modern internal rhyme. The main character’s life runs through death into reincarnation without ever leaving his body—and he describes this process to us in living color.
This down to earth treatment gives a clear view in simple terms of truths that we more often find fossilized within concretized symbols beneath rusting metaphor. For an experience unique in comedic drama, spirituality, adventure, and sheer creativity, start reading Reincarnation Through Common Sense from the beginning.
http://fearlesspuppy.org/m_reincarnation.htm $21 in print e-book $5.75 ISBN#978-0-692-01952-8
direct links from our website to Amazon print and Smashwords e-book
Fearless Puppy on American Road This amazing true story reads like a fantasy. Fearless Puppy is a transfictional self-help book. It is both comedic and dramatic—a butt kicking, page-turning adventure story that makes deep spiritual impressions.
Within this book you will meet several saintly Tibetan Lamas. You will also meet a man who is his own uncle, specialists in smoke, mirrors, and invisibility, spirited sex, oxygen orgasms, heavenly Hell’s Angels, phony preachers, domestic violence/domestic solutions, racist killers in America, Canadian race wars, Native American wise men, a bit of Christian ethics and Jewish ritual, angelic witches, benevolent heroin addicts, magical birds, an all-lesbian band playing a rock concert for the deaf, the musician raised by multi-ethnic golden-hearted prostitutes, martial artists battling neo-Nazis, the modern-day Robin Hood, and many other strangely wonderful people.
Buckle your seatbelt tightly, take a deep breath, and enjoy the ride. Fearless Puppy runs on rocket fuel!
*Please forward this through your contact and friend lists, and to anyone you think might be interested. Help us raise funds through book sales to sponsor Wisdom Professionals. Your effort is important! Thank you.
$21 in print e-book $5.75 ISBN#978--0615781181
Doug “Ten” Rose may be the biggest smartass as well as the wisest and most entertaining survivor of the hitchhiking adventurers that used to cover America’s highways. He is the author of Fearless Puppy on American Road and Reincarnation Through Common Sense, has survived heroin addiction and death, and is a graduate of over a hundred thousand miles of travel without ever driving a car, owning a phone, or having a bank account. Ten Rose and his work are a vibrant part of the present and future as well as an essential remnant of a vanishing breed.